Its Okay To Be Slightly Different

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Walking The Path Less Taken

Growing up it’s always the differences that we fear in ourselves and tend to ridicule in others. We are a cruel species. There seems to be a comfort in being exactly like everyone else or being different in a conformist way such as punks, goths, teddy boys etc. etc. It is comical really that even the rebels need a support group to be different in. And then return to the fold a little later in life when the phase has been satisfactorily completed. The truly different have no comfortable place in society. The feeling is always one of being an outsider.

Being the same or falling within the considered normal parameters of looks and behaviour means we attract less attention. We do seem to be valued more as normal if we do fall within certain invisible and visible parameters. However, we still all think we are being true to ourselves. Mostly we try to belong and may even hate our originality seeing it as a barrier to our being accepted as part of the gang. hampering our success.

Part of this process is a gradual acceptance of our imperfect perfection and realizing that we are a process. We are constantly changing. Never a fixed object. No matter how much we try to remain rigid and unchanging, we change in every moment. The funny thing about our situation or one of them is that we are all feeling isolated by the “fitting in” process but never once stop to think that others are suffering in similar ways.

Playing The Game – Fitting In!

We are all trying to be what others, society in general and big business think we should be. We get hopelessly lost wearing dozens of masks to fit in with what is normal because we don’t believe we could ever be good enough and accepted just as we are. It even becomes difficult to know who we are – we have become so buried beneath so many different roles that we have played for so long that we think that is who we really are.

MASKS! Who Shall I Be Today?

There are many roles to fit all our situations. If we think about it, it becomes obvious how we change to fit our many roles. My Irish father even used to change his voice to meet what he thought was expected of him. Trying to lose his accent was his way of becoming more acceptable in a time when he thought being Irish would hold him back from success. Just another example of something we are all doing all the time.

We want to be loved and highly thought of. And we will become whatever we need to become to be popular and successful – encouraged by society.

This process of belonging guarantees the creation of many fake personas and allows the profit mongers to gain by manipulating who we need to be in every situation and changing the personas frequently for new gain. Who is in and who is out is a never-ending process and there is no success if you are considered outside of the norms.

If we remain unaware we are formed by big business and our need to fit in with the norms. This, in turn, makes us popular with others like us. Maybe even to be awesomely heroic in other’s eyes. The force is strong and gives the person of high-status power which has been considered by many to be some human beings driving force. The will to power.

The Moment Of Awareness

We are creations of natural selection, our families and our culture which shapes our minds and bodies until the day arrives (or not) that we wake up and refuse to play. We then begin to question everything, sometimes outwardly but if we are wise and don’t want to piss all others off we are a little more inward with our questioning. We refuse to accept as self-evident much that we have been sold as the truth and become curious as to the many other options available to us.

This moment illuminates just how ridiculous our conditioning is in many ways and tends to isolate us from the happily conforming others that believe whatever they are told as the one and only unchanging truth.

Living Becomes Awkward

It becomes difficult to be with those that continuously spout the conditioned beliefs at every moment. As we can’t argue every point with them. And nobody likes to have their philosophies for life questioned at every turn even if they are only second hand and fake. I find time spent with my family exasperating but I am learning to shrug and let everything go rather than get into discussions that others will never understand. Particularly if you are well-read and apply the knowledge to every day living. Trust me! Unless they are ready for change they will not even get what you are talking about. Remember their thoughts, ideas and beliefs are gospel for them. They will be amazed you even have an alternative thought and will think you are crazy or heading that way.

The best you can hope for is a resounding “you have some funny ideas”. I have heard that often. Or you may be placed on a pedestal of being super smart and above them in intelligence. This is just a way of avoiding having to engage with the world in a more practical way. Accepting conditioning is easy, using others ideas is easy, having to read and learn about the world other than the bias daily news media is a step they are unwilling to take. Often the only thing different is the fact that one reads and keeps a truly open-mind. Frequently our friends change as if by magic. New friends seem to vibrate at an energy level more closely to the “crazy” (not really) energy you will now be emitting.

It Could Be Hopeless – We Hope Not

This is the price we pay when we begin to find our true nature and begin to manage our ego better and understand that if left unchecked our ego will run our lives for us. For me, the ego is the part of us that wants to achieve status and be thought great without having to do anything. Natural selection and cultural norms (nature and nurture) have conditioned our actions prior to this moment. The time for deprogramming has arrived and will never stop once awareness has begun. Time to realize some of the unlimited potentials each of us has. Life becomes exciting when viewed through the awareness that all we thought we knew as certain up to now is probably wrong and we have many other choices and a power to create that we have yet to consciously realise. There are NO certainties.

Telling a Better Story

We now celebrate being slightly different. No apologies. We begin to find our true nature and manage our egoic mind which when compared to social norms (unmanaged mind) is very different indeed. Unlike our ego, our soul whispers(awareness) and we must learn to listen to that part of us that until now has mostly been drowned out by the controlling ego. We realise that what we see as reality is mostly created by our own minds. There are no things in themselves. We unknowingly create what we see. The acceptance of this fact empowers us to start to slowly transcend our conditioning. We start telling a different strory.

Being Normal becomes Less Attractive

We move further away from the norms moment by moment. These are ego-driven and we still must juggle living in our cultural setting whilst edging closer to working with our egoic mind rather than being ruled by it. Being dragged back into a full-on ego world of wanting, judging and being right is a constant threat. We see it all around and in the media daily. Our progress is not a straight line as with any goal we zig-zag back and forth between ego-rule and ego co-operation all the while endeavouring to harmonize our conditioned behaviours with chosen behaviours that better suit us as individuals and as societies. It is not easy to enlist the help of a fearful ego to help find our sweet spots for living a good life. But that is the task we face.

Cruise Control (not really, but better)

There is no feeling comparable to being in flow with oneself (fear-free) which is one and in flow with all there is. A peace that makes turbulent ego-mind a less and less attractive place to live one’s life. For many this is God mind, The Tao, enlightenment or the higher self – all good and it matters not what words we use. They are just metaphors for how we are feeling and how we are more comfortable when the truth is a flexible concept for us. Arguing over details has a cost and is costing mankind dearly and stops our evolution to higher vibrations and a better existence. The same can be said for all 21st-century distractions and addictions that are barriers to our growth and awareness. There are many.

We all want the same thing. And it can’t be purchased online and delivered next day.

There are no evil religions just evil human acts against the world. Evil could use any medium to justify foul acts against humanity. For me – religions are each worthy ego management systems run by the very ego needing to be managed (it can be no other way) and as such difficult to progress but difficult is not impossible. We all have that issue – trying to become less ego conditioned whilst using that same ego mind to change. Hmm! Crazy but true. This is the point when we realise that our language is not able to describe what we want it to. One of our main limitations is our language and it is also one of our greatest gifts. Context is everything. A truly Flexarian slant. Both!

Locked Into The World of Language

A language is an ego tool and we are attempting to step outside of ego. One of the reasons so many psychedelic trips are unexplainable is because they take mind outside of egoic-mind to a place that we have no words for. Possibly the same as dream world – where things happen that are impossible in the egoic-mind world. Everything just flows into one when compared to the fixed categories, lines and edges to be found in our egoic world.

Playing The Game At The Level We Live

We are all born into a world that is just like a game with fixed rules and perceptions from individual to the collective level. We all have abilities and strengths appertaining to survival in this game. Jung’s universal mind theory understood this. The individual and the collective are equally vital in this game. Both! Not split as politics attempts to do. Trips and dreams are experienced outside of the world of Language society and the gameplay rules do not apply. Outside of egoic mind there seem to be Salvador Dali like worlds. Maybe worlds closer to what is really out there before our brains process the energy. Or maybe nothing at all but pure energy and a will to power as believed by Friedrich Nietzsche. Energy + will to power (ego) + human brain and interactions (mind) = the apparent world we experience good, bad and indifferent.

Becoming comfortable being slightly different and inflow with the world is the mature progress road. Dare to be different. Break free from ego prison. Choosing to love over fear dissipates ego as poor ego behaviour is created by fear.

Awareness Is Freedom

What a buzz to know we can change totally. What a project for life to rediscover our possibilities and our mostly primitive sacred nature.

Natural selection is where we can find many of our whys when it comes to behaviour and understanding. Evolutionary psychology explains probable behaviour not guaranteed and neuro-science shows how the brain reacts and really works. Once we realise how little control we actually have over our thoughts and behaviours we can then begin to work with what we are to make changes and to better understand the worlds we are creating and the people that we share those worlds with. We can change this behaviour through awareness that probable behaviour does not have to rule our lives.

Our likelihood of altruism towards blood relatives is guaranteed behaviour and we would sacrifice ourselves for kin but I would do the same for my wife Julie and we share no blood tie. Like I said probably does not mean we have no control – it is just the more likely behaviour.

I say worlds plural because each of us interprets our experience in a unique fashion and as such we are all having an experience that is purely personal. But we are having that experience connected to and with millions of others.

Wow! – Enjoy your day –

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Thanks – Adam Senex -x-